Outline for the Commentary

1. Introduction
a. Background
b. When the team was started
c. Some of the former coaches and who the coaches are this season

2. Community Service
a. What years, who did it, and what did they do
b. What have other teams done for community service
c. How do they compare to UCF

3. Individual Role Models
a. Using several interviews, state the players views on their own responsibility
b. Using interviews from students who see players on campus, state whether they think the players act responsible and reflect a positive image on the rest of their team

4. Teamwork
a. How they work together as a team
b. How freshman players were welcomed on the team
c. Examples of other teams who display great teamwork

5. How well the team plays
a. Information on how many wins to loses the team has had in the past few years of conference games
b. Players they had go to the NBA and other after college programs
c. How they ranked compared to other teams in their conference

6. Conclusion
a. Overall, how UCF compares to other NCAA teams
b. How they rank as role models
c. How they rank in skills

Template B: Criteria

To start my review I will give a brief introduction about the UCF basketball team. I will then go on to state what makes a good NCAA basketball team. I will provide research to support my review. I will give example of other college basketball teams and what they have done to make their team look so great. I will also give examples of teams who have shown none of the qualities of a great basketball team. I will then describe how well the UCF team displays teamwork on the court. I will support my review with interviews from the players in the team, their viewers, and possibly one of the coaches. I will use what information they provide me with to help justify my review. Next, I will describe how the UCF basketball team reflects on the community as a whole. I will ask viewers what they think of the program off the court, and I will research what community service and activities the team has participated in during the past years. Finally, I will compare the UCF basketball team to what would make an ideal team. I will use my research of how other teams have displayed teamwork and community service to support my analysis. I will be able to rate UCF’s basketball team based on how well they seem to be compared to some of the great teams as well as some of the not so great teams. As of yet, I believe the UCF basketball team will have a pretty positive review, however I need to research several different NCAA basketball teams from across the country in order to have the best review possible.

Plagiarism Workshop

Amanda Neary-Carey
Erin O'Malley
Sara Jokela

1. 0
It is not plagiarism because they are doing their own paper but they are just using the same sources. This could turn into plagiarism if they decide to compare their papers and take ideas off of their actual papers.

2. 4
Although it is your own paper, you should not turn in the same paper for two different classes. The University can see that two papers that are one in the same were turned in and they may view that as plagiarism.

3.0
You are not copying their work or posting what they are saying, but you are just looking at others' posts to feel more comfortable with the assignment and better understand what you are suppose to do. If you were to actually take what they said on their posts and copy it to yours, then that would be plagiarism.

4.5
It is definitely plagiarism because you used their work and changed it enough to call it your own, even though it is their template.

Template A: Audience Analysis

Topic- A Review of UCF’s Basketball Team
The audience of my review would be a variety of people. The review may be directed toward people who enjoy college sports and want to learn more about Knight’s basketball. The audience may also be NCAA basketball coaches who wish to compare and contrast their team with UCF’s team. College sports must be of value or at least of interest to those who read the review. They are likely to be concerned with NCAA basketball and follow the sport. Socially, my audience must know the sport in order to be able to talk about it within their social groups. Coaches must also know how other teams function so that they can see how their team compares with others.

The friends of my audience are also interested in sports. Although a larger majority of men enjoy following the world of sports, women may also be interested. Since this is a review about one of UCF’s teams, students and faculty of UCF are most likely to be interested in learning more about their basketball players. It would socially hurt these people to not be updated on the current status of college sports, especially NCAA basketball coaches. This is because their friends might be having a conversation about events that happened during a game or within a team, and if the person did not follow this information, they would be completely lost. They would not be a part of their friends’ conversations and they might feel excluded from the group if everyone knew what they were talking about, but they did not. As for coaches who would read the review, they would also have friends interested in college basketball, for that is what their whole career revolves around. They need to know how teams among their conference are functioning and how to take both the good examples and bad examples that teams demonstrate into perspective in order to effectively coach their own team. The information in my review would be important to know so they can learn the effectiveness of UCF’s basketball team.

To the sports fanatics reading my review, real, direct, and tangible benefits are learning more about a sports team than meets the eye. Anyone can look up the team’s stats and see how the players played throughout the season, but for those who are really interested, that is just simply not enough. This audience has a need to know what really goes on with the players outside of just their conference games. They want to know how the team has interacted with their community, how they get along with their teammates, and how well they display teamwork and sportsmanship to their viewers. For coaches who read this review the benefit would be gathering information about how the Knight’s basketball team functions as well as their activities both on and off the court and being able to take examples from this team so they can use them to make their own team stronger. Though the sports fans need to know this information to better fit in with their friends, coaches really need to know this information to better lead their teams.

Topic for Review

The effectiveness of UCF's basketball team being responsible role models as well as displaying team work.

Thesis Paragraph for Commentary

While taking a walk anywhere on the University of Central Florida campus one can easily notice that there are as many if not more recycling bins as trash cans in and around every building. From the dormitories to the student union these bins are placed everywhere. An everyday UCF student might also notice a “UCF Recycles” truck coming to empty those exact recycling bins every once and a while. As students walk around they might notice that one of the trends these days on campus is the pro-environment clothing that many students’ wardrobes have embraced. What is not as apparent as the big plastic recycling tubs or the trendy “go green” t-shirts are the efforts that UCF is making to ensure a healthy environment. From global warming to hazardous waste issues, the Earth’s environmental issues now affect our entire world, and UCF takes an active stance, including group efforts, a green roof, and recycling, to make the environment a healthier place. This is extremely important because it shapes the future for the environmental status of Orlando and teaches students the importance of the global issue of protecting the Earth.

Outline for the Commentary

I. Observations on campus
a. Recycling bins
b. Clothing
c. Mobile recycling

II. What the problem with the Earth is
a. The environmental issues
b. How people’s actions affect it
c. The environmental issue on a global scale

III. What are people on campus doing
a. Wearing eco-friendly clothing
b. Utilizing recycling bins
c. How some people are not doing their part

IV. UCF and the environment
a. How UCF is eco-friendly
b. Groups that UCF are involved in
c. How to participate

V. Conclusion
a. How UCF’s relationship with the environment relates to the rest of the world
b. How to participate in UCF’s involvement
c. Why recycling really helps the environment and why it is important

Letter to Friend for Commentary

Dear Amy,
UCF is so interesting and I wish you went to school here. One phenomenon that seems really interesting to me is the concern for the environment that is shown here on campus every day. You know how I love to do my part in keeping the earth clean? I have learned over the past few weeks from walking around campus that UCF does its part too! The faculty and students take measures to promote a clean and healthy environment. I always see people walking around in t-shirts that have earths on them or displaying recycling signs. I think that is pretty wonderful that people are turning the environmental issue into a fashion statement in order to try to get more people involved. It really seems to be working. Where do you think all of these people are getting these fashionable clothes? I think we should get some because we care about the earth and I think if people see us wearing them they might want some environment-friendly clothes as well.
You will have to walk around campus with me some day. I swear there are as many, if not more, recycling bins as there are garbage cans on campus. Where do all of these recyclable materials go? Most people, including myself, utilize these bins on campus when throwing away items such as plastic bottles or papers. If everyone on campus used those bins, then there sure would be a lot to recycle. But what does recycling actually do for the environment? It must be a really good help to the environment because if used or not, these bins are everywhere on campus. They are even in the hallways in my dorm building. I always see big “UCF Recycles” trucks outside of my dorm room. I even saw a mini recycling truck when I was tailgating at the football game. I bet many people had a lot to recycle then.
With all of these measures that my school and the students here are taking it really makes me wonder. What is the big problem with our environment that everyone is worried about? I know that littering cannot be good for the earth but I wonder if there is a much larger problem that I am unaware of. One time at a tailgating event I saw a little stand for environmental protection. There was too many people surrounding it because it was right by the overcrowded SGA booth and I did not have time to make my way up to it. But that also had me thinking. Is there a UCF organized group that talks about the environmental issues and maybe one that takes action to support a healthy environment? I think that would be such a productive group because they would be able to inform students who have a lack of knowledge for these particular issues and could make movements to increase the health of our planet.
You really need to come and take a look for yourself at the environmental phenomenon occurring here at UCF. Hope all is well!

Love,
Amanda

Observations and Impressions for the Commentary

As I walked around campus for these past few weeks, I have noticed that the students and faculty here are really getting involved in the “go green” effort. I have seen as many if not more recycling bins as trash cans. I have also seen UCF recycles signs, and have even seen a mobile recycling truck at the tailgating event before a football game. I have also seen many, as well as myself, wearing shirts that show people want to take better care of the planet (such as earth and recycling shirts). It looks and feels good knowing that at least some people care about the planet. This reminds me of how after 9/11 everyone wore shirts displaying their patriotism. There was also an increase the amount of American flags I saw. Now the environmental issues are the problem, and a lot of people are doing what they can to help prevent some of those issues. This is unlike anything I have ever experienced because as I was growing up the people around me were not really aware or cared about the status of the environment. Now, it is the phenomenon that people are worried about and almost everybody is aware of it. As mentioned, I have seen a lot of support for the protection of the environment such as people recycling and people wearing shirts that show they support the cause. However, many simply do not care or have better things to worry about as they litter in the sidewalks on campus and throw their plastics and paper with the rest of their trash. They are just simply unaware of the state of our environment or they just do not care. There are differences between my response and others. For example, I never leave trash on the ground and I utilize the recycling bins that UCF offers, where as a lot of my friends will just litter on the ground and throw away their recyclable materials with the rest of their garbage. This phenomenon is significant to me because I like to see that people are caring and putting forth an effort to help the environment. Though it is significant in the same way to many, others just do not care or even notice this phenomenon at all.

Interview with Erin and Sarah

Topic: The pro-environment status at UCF

1. What is the real problem with the environment that everyone is worried about?
The problem is the fear of the end of the world and people who don’t take care about the Earth which affects everyone.
2. Where do the recycled materials from the UCF bins go?
They think the materials go to a much larger recycling company.
3. What does recycling actually do for the environment?
You’re reusing so you don’t take up as many resources, less trees are cut down,and it reduces waste.
4. Where are people buying the pro-environment clothes?
Stores include Wal-Mart (shirt made out of bottles), pink at Victoria’s Secret, and many other stores.
5. Is there a group or organization at UCF that discusses the environment issues?
They don’t know what it is called but they do have town house meetings.
6.How do you know what you know? (evidence)
She lives in Brevard “the green hall” at Libra and was given recycling bins for her room.
7.Who are you to the subject? (perspective)
They are students who recycle and live in dorms on campus.
8. How is this event connected to other events? (patterns or opposing forces)
The whole world is trying to “go green” and it is related to the global phenomenon (cars and water bottles) and recycled items rather than just on campus.
9.What if things were different? (suppositions/predictions)
If UCF didn’t recycle then we would be contributing to the environmental problems.
10. Why is this important? (significance)
If we don’t recycle and keep throwing everything away then the planet will not last very long.

5 Questions for the Commentary

Topic: The pro-environment status at UCF
1. What is the real problem with the environment that everyone is worried about?
2. Where do the recycled materials from the UCF bins go?
3. What does recycling actually do for the environment?
4. Where are people buying the pro-environment clothes?
5. Is there a group or organization at UCF that discusses the environment issues?

Commentary Brainstorm

1. Go Green! The school's reaction to the global environment crisis
2. Banning skateboarding/biking on campus
3. The flu scare and what the school is doing to prevent the spread

Final Memoir

The weather was so cold that when one walked outside, his or her nose would immediately turn bright cherry red from the icy wind and burn every time the air stirred. It is like this in Connecticut for over six months of the year. We had just moved into my Grandpa’s old house. He had moved out and we had just sold our cute, yellow house with the green shudders on Wayne Drive. We loved that house and we had made it our home by painting it, putting in hard wood flooring, and even making the sun room into a finished bonus room with a pellet stove that we would all huddle around with our palms up to the fire in order to keep warm during the harsh winter. Now my mom was pregnant with my brother, and this was her third child. This meant we would have 5 people in our family, and the cute, yellow house with the green shudders only had three bedrooms. There was simply not enough room. Moving into my Grandpa’s house was temporary and my parents were searching for a new house for our growing family: the search which had initiated the start of a rigorous journey for me, including many obstacles to overcome and a whole new life to adjust to.

I thought my parents were searching for a house in our little town of Plainville, so that I would not have to switch schools. At the time I had just turned thirteen and I figured my mom would understand that I could not possibly change my school and move away from all my friends and all the people I loved. Looking back, I was utterly unprepared for what was to come next. My mom, my step-dad and I were relaxing inside like bears in their cave who keep warm from the misery outside on one of those frost-bitten Connecticut days. My mom, beautiful with her blonde hair and brown eyes, and quite round from being pregnant, looked me in the eyes and said, “Amanda, how would you feel about moving to Florida?”

This question really shocked me. “Florida?” I asked in disbelief. It felt just as silly of a question as if she had asked, “Amanda, how would you feel about rock-climbing up the empire state building?” Both my mom and step-dad were looking at me, curious of my reaction. My first thought was definitely a rejection. I could not leave Connecticut. This was my home. I could not leave my dad, or my baby sisters, or my grandparents. I could not leave my best friend Lynleigh, or all my other friends at my school. This was just simply not possible. And besides, I definitely knew I would not be able to tell all of them I was leaving. Just seeing the tears well up in their eyes as I tried to choke out the words was something I could not possibly bare. Especially my father, I loved him so much: both him and my baby sisters that lived with him. I could not stand the thought of just seeing them a few times a year.

“Yeah right.” I told my mom and step-dad. They could not be serious about this impulsive thought. “We are serious about this, Amanda,” My mom replied, as if to completely contradict the flow in which my thought-current was traveling. She then went on to list the pros of her idea to try to make me see past all of the cons that seemed to form the never ending list that was in my mind. She told me we would get a bigger house, an in-ground pool, and that I could pick out my own room. The way she described the new life she had in mind for our family made moving sound like a really good idea. My mother is so persuasive that she can make an elf believe they are ten feet tall.

The hardest person to leave was my dad. My mom made it sound like I would see him more if I moved. She said I can spend all the major vacations with him so I would see him and his family (my sisters and step-mom) for a week at a time instead of just weekends, like how it was at the time. I repeat: my mother is very persuasive. Little did I know how many other people I would have to see when I visited Connecticut. I had to visit my grandparents, my friends, my uncle, aunt and cousins. The to-do list I had when I visited was like Michael Phelps’s appetite: never ending. I really never ended up getting any full weeks with my dad. He is now in Heaven and I will never stop missing him.

We packed up our family and all of our belongings after my brother was born and moved into a bright pink Floridian house. We did, of course paint it to a chocolate brown. It was the end of December and we went from frigid, icy weather in Connecticut and to the warm, humid Florida air. I picked the room with the wall of tall windows and the closet made of mirrors to call my own. It was New Years Eve a few nights after we settled in. The family across the street (the Jordans, who have moved but remain family friends) were throwing a party and some of the neighborhood teens were also outside. We were invited over and that is when I met Katherine (who had brown hair, brown eyes, and never seemed to run out of words to say; She could have an hour-long conversation about an electrical outlet if that particular thought crossed her mind) and her friends Erin and Darren, who also lived in the neighborhood. Katherine and I became good friends, which had made the transition into a new school a little bit easier.

Though having at least 2 friends so far (Darren was a year older and therefore he was in high school), switching to a new school when I was thirteen and in the middle of eighth grade was extremely difficult. Everyone at Jackson Heights Middle School seemed to know each other their whole lives and for the first time I was the outsider and a stranger to all. Everyone’s eyes seemed as if they were needles poking me every step I took. They all already had their groups of friends and did not really act like they wanted a new member. I have never been the shy girl, but it was as if I was in a whole new world and I simply did not know how to react to this. MSP (the Middle School of Plainville) was not even ten years old. Everything there was new and clean and all the teachers and students knew me and were all really nice to me. On the other hand, Jackson Heights was filthy. I could not believe the school had more than one building since the school I came from had one building that was really easy to get around in. The staircases at this new school were covered in dirt and filth and the whole lunch table I sat at had to get up and move because a cockroach just came out of the wall. My first day there, I got lost trying to find most of my classes and could not figure out how to read the bus schedule and find my bus and all the busses left. I was miserable and stranded, as if I were a lost, amateur sailor in the middle of the ocean, and I had to wait an hour for my aunt to pick me up and bring me home where I broke down and told my mom, “I absolutely hate it here. I want to move back with Dad.”

On top of that, the schoolwork at middle school in Plainville was so easy to me. There were no advanced classes so I got an easy A in everything. When I came here the administrators at Jackson saw that I had all A’s and decided to put me in all honors courses. I was surprised by how quickly these classes moved and how harsh the teachers could be. Some teachers were upset with me just because I did not understand everything that the other students had been learning for months on the first day. I got out of school at four (different, and way worse than the two-thirty release in Plainville) and stayed up till about ten every night trying to complete homework that I would start right when I got home from school.

“You need to take it day by day and if you still hate it after a year you can decide if you want to go back” is what my mother told me. At the time I already knew I was going to move back to Connecticut. I could never possibly love Oviedo or the people in it as much as I loved Plainville and the people who lived there. However, I did take it day by day. I got my grades up and became an exceptional student in every one of my classes. Nothing but and A was acceptable to me. A year passed and another as well, and I was starting to adjust to this lifestyle. With harder courses than Plainville had to offer, I was able to get a much better education than I would have got if I still lived in that small town. I excelled in all my classes every year, made the cheerleading team every year, and finally became really close with some new friends. Junior year came along and when I started dating my boyfriend, Dustin, I realized I did not want to move back and that I actually enjoyed living here. Now, it is always nice every time I visit my family in Connecticut, but I know my home is here. I know that I really hated living here at first, but I am able to look back and say that I was strong enough to adjust and overcome the hardships. I was able to look past the bad in order to see the good in my life, and I was finally able to say that I am happy where I am.

Memoir Draft

It was probably cold with a hint of depressing outside. It was most likely raining or snowing out, which it is more than half of the year in Connecticut. We had just moved into my Grandpa’s old house. He had moved out and we had just sold our cute, yellow house with the green shudders on Wayne Drive. We loved that house and we had made it our home by painting it, putting in hard wood flooring, and even making the sun room into a finished bonus room with a pellet stove that we would sit around to keep warm during the harsh winter. Now my mom was pregnant with my brother, and this was her third child. This meant we would have 5 people in our family, and the cute, yellow house with the green shudders only had three bedrooms. There was simply not enough room. Moving into my Grandpa’s house was temporary and my parents were searching for a new house for our growing family: the search which had initiated the start of a rigorous journey for me, including many obstacles to overcome and a whole new life to adjust to.

I thought my parents were searching for a house in our little town of Plainville, so that I would not have to switch schools. At the time I had just turned thirteen and I figured my mom would understand that I could not possibly change my school and move away from all my friends and all the people I loved. Looking back, I was not prepared for what was to come next. My mom, my step-dad and I were sitting in the living room on one of those cold, rainy Connecticut days. My mom, beautiful, blonde, and quite round from being pregnant, looked me in the eyes and said, “Amanda, how would you feel about moving to Florida?”

This question really shocked me. “Florida?” I asked in disbelief. Both my mom and step-dad were looking at me, curious of my reaction. My first thought was definitely a rejection. I could not leave Connecticut. This was my home. I could not leave my dad, or my baby sisters, or my grandparents. I could not leave my best friend Lynleigh, or all my other friends at my school. This was just simply not possible. And besides, I definitely knew I would not be able to tell all of them I was leaving. Just seeing the saddened look in their eyes was something I could not possibly bare. Especially my father, I loved him so much: both him and my baby sisters that lived with him. I could not stand the thought of just seeing them a few times a year.

“Yeah right.” I told my mom and step-dad. They could not be serious about this impulsive thought. “We are serious about this, Amanda,” My mom replied. She then went on to list the pros of her idea to try to make me see past all of the cons that seemed to form the never ending list that was in my mind. She told me we would get a bigger house, an in-ground pool, and that I could pick out my own room. The way she described the new life she had in mind for our family made moving sound like a really good idea. My mother is so persuasive.

The hardest person to leave was my dad. My mom made it sound like I would see him more if I moved. She said I can spend all the major vacations with him so I would see him and his family (my sisters and step-mom) for a week at a time instead of just weekends, like how it was at the time. Little did I know how many other people I would have to see when I visited Connecticut. I had to visit my grandparents, my friends, my uncle, aunt and cousins. I really never ended up getting any full weeks with my dad. He is now in Heaven and I will never stop missing him.

We packed up our family and all of our belongings after my brother was born and moved into a bright pink Floridian house. We did, of course paint it to a chocolate brown. It was the end of December and we went from frigid weather in Connecticut and to the warm, humid Florida air. I picked the room with the wall of tall windows and the closet made of mirrors to call my own. It was New Years Eve a few nights after we settled in. The family across the street (the Jordans, who have moved but remain family friends) were throwing a party and some of the neighborhood teens were also outside. We were invited over and that is when I met Katherine (who had brown hair, brown eyes, and never seemed to run out of words to say) and her friends Erin and Darren, who also lived in the neighborhood. Katherine and I became good friends, which had made the transition to a new school a little bit easier.

Though having at least 2 friends so far (Darren was a year older and therefore he was in high school), switching to a new school when I was thirteen and in the middle of eighth grade was extremely difficult. Everyone at Jackson Heights Middle School seemed to know each other their whole lives and for the first time I was the outsider and a stranger to all. Everyone already had their groups of friends and did not really act like they wanted a new member. I have never been the shy girl, but it was as if I was in a whole new world and I simply did not know how to react to this. MSP (the Middle School of Plainville) was not even ten years old. Everything there was new and clean and all the teachers and students knew me and were all really nice to me. On the other hand, Jackson Heights was filthy. I could not believe the school had more than one building since the school I came from had one building that was really easy to get around in. The staircases at this new school were covered in dirt and filth and the whole lunch table I sat at had to get up and move because a cockroach just came out of the wall. My first day there, I got lost trying to find most of my classes and could not figure out how to read the bus schedule and find my bus and all the busses left. I was miserable and stranded and had to wait an hour for my aunt to pick me up and bring me home where I broke down and told my mom, “I absolutely hate it here. I want to move back with Dad.”

On top of that, the schoolwork at middle school in Plainville was so easy to me. There were no advanced classes so I got an easy A in everything. When I came here the administrators at Jackson saw that I had all A’s and decided to put me in all honors courses. I was surprised by how quickly these classes moved and how harsh the teachers could be. I got out of school at four (different, and way worse than the two-thirty release in Plainville) and stayed up till about ten every night trying to complete homework that I would start right when I got home from school.

“You need to take it day by day and if you still hate it after a year you can decide if you want to go back” is what my mother told me. At the time I already knew I was going to move back to Connecticut. I could never possibly love Oviedo or the people in it as much as I loved Plainville and the people who lived there. However, I did take it day by day. I got my grades up and became an exceptional student in every one of my classes. A year passed and another as well, and I was starting to adjust to this lifestyle. With harder courses than Plainville had to offer, I was able to get a much better education than I would have got if I still lived in that small town. I excelled in all my classes every year, made the cheerleading team every year, and finally became really close with some new friends. Junior year came along and when I started dating my boyfriend, Dustin, I realized I did not want to move back and that I actually enjoyed living here. Now, it is always nice every time I visit my family in Connecticut, but I know my home is here. I know that I really hated living here at first, but I am able to look back and say that I was strong enough to adjust and overcome the hardships. I was able to look past the bad in order to see the good in my life, and I was finally able to say that I am happy where I am.

Memo

To: Ms. Moody, From: Amanda Neary-Carey
In class, my intro draft was reviewed by Erin. She really gave me helpful advice on how to increase the strength of my paper. My topic is about my move from Connecticut to Florida and its effect on my life. Like me, Erin also moved to Florida when she was thirteen so she was able to relate to my story and add suggestions to it to make it better. Erin said that I should add in my memoir, my feelings about moving from Connecticut. This was really good advice since I was planning on writing about my feelings about moving to Florida and how I felt about this new place, but now I realize I need to also write about moving away from my hometown and everything I have ever known. In my memoir, I will probably first start writing about my feelings about moving to Florida and what I expected out of it, and then I will include my feelings about moving from my hometown and my family and how I was sad about that. Erin also said I should add more detail. I will describe more about my hometown in my memoir and create a visual scene so that my audience can feel familiar with the place. I can also describe the differences between my old town and Oviedo, which is the town that I moved to, so that my audience will have an easier time understanding my feelings about the move. I can describe people with more visual details, such as how they looked and sounded like, and also describe what both of my houses looked like. I think for my memoir I will start off with when I found out I was moving, then I will write about my feelings about leaving my hometown as well as my expectations about my new town. I will then talk about the actual move itself, so the audience can read about what it was like, but I will write much about that because that does not have much to do with the point that I am trying to make with my memoir. I will then talk about how different the schools were and how getting new friends in the middle of eighth grade was way more difficult than I had imagined it to be. I will talk about how I missed my family back in Connecticut and it was so much harder to leave them than I thought it would be. I will talk about how difficult it was at first and then my story will turn when I finally adjusted and started to love living here. I will say how I will never stop missing my family, but when I visit that old small town, I know my move was for the better and I am ultimately very happy with my life because of it.

The Memoir

It was probably cold and depressing outside. It was probably raining or snowing outside, which it is more than half of the year in Connecticut. We had just moved into my Grandpa’s old house. He had moved out and we had just sold our cute, yellow house with the green shudders on Wayne Drive. We loved that house and we had made it our home by painting it, putting in hard wood flooring, and even making the sun room into a finished bonus room with a pellet stove that we would sit around to keep warm during the harsh winter. Now my mom was pregnant with my brother, and this was her third child. This meant we would have 5 people in our family, and the cute, yellow house with the green shudders only had three bedrooms. There was simply not enough room. Moving into my Grandpa’s house was temporary and my parents were searching for a new house for our growing family.
I thought my parents were searching for a house in our little town of Plainville, so that I would not have to switch schools. At the time I had just turned thirteen and I figured my mom would understand that I could not possibly change my school and move away from all my friends and all the people I loved. Looking back, I was not prepared for what was to come next. My mom, my step-dad and I were sitting in the living room on one of those cold, rainy Connecticut days. My mom, young and beautiful, blonde with big brown eyes, and quite round from being pregnant, looked me in the eyes and said, “Amanda, how would you feel about moving to Florida?”

Brainstorming

Topic: Moving from Connecticut to Florida and how my life was completely changed because of it.
How to start: I think I will start by describing the scene when I found out that my family wanted to move. I was in my living room and my mom asked how I would feel about it and I did not know what to say. Life was good at the time, we were happy in Connecticut. At the same time, it seemed as if Florida was a whole new world and the idea was very exciting. I think I will start my memoir off by describing the scene in which I found out (the living room) and my thoughts and feelings about it. I will also describe each person in the scene which I think were my mom and step-dad.

The Invention Process

Three potential ideas for essay's central focus:
1. The September eleventh terrorist attacks
2. When my brother, Ryan, was born
3. When I moved to Florida

What are they about?
1. About 3,000 were killed in the terrorist attacks on the World Trade Center, the Pentagon and in Pennsylvania. This seriously disturbed the USA and really had an impact on my life.
2. My youngest sibling, Ryan, was born with several medical conditions including jaundice and an enlarged soft spot. I was thirteen years old at the time and very scared for my baby brother.
3. On December 28, 2004, my family packed up and moved half way across the country from Connecticut to Florida. We left everything behind and had to start a whole new life.

So What?
1. As a young child living in the North, the September eleventh terrorist attacks were my first realization that true evil exists in the world. I could not understand why anyone would do such a thing and it made me feel less safe about the country and flying on planes.
2. When my brother was born with medical conditions I could not understand why I loved someone who I just met so much and I would not be able to take it if I lost him. I prayed more than I ever prayed before for him to get better.
3. When I was deciding if I really wanted to move to Florida, there were too many pros and cons that one really could not outweigh the other. I had to deal with so much in the process od moving and settling down in a whole new place.